Shouyousei's dream started pleasantly enough. A good night, good friends, and a warm romance waiting when darkness creeped through the windows. When the morning crested though, she was alone. She'd been abandoned, again. Familiar thoughts creeped into her mind, dark whispers from the past.

You didn't deserve him anyways.

You'll always be alone.

It's a good thing he left before he found out how broken you are.

Hateful words from source unknown gripped at her heart, old anxieties that still controlled her. They were wrong, she knew they were, she just had to find him to explain…

He left because you're not good enough.

You'd never be enough for him.

Frantic now, she threw open the door to her apartment, only to be knocked back by a gust of wind. Noise assaulted her, a howling of wind and rain that passed around her, deafening her. Moments passed, and so did the storm, fading out to the comfortable din of rain slamming into an old tin roof.

Her parents' old barn. She'd always loved the sound of rain against the metal, and the white noise comforted her, drowning out the whispers as if they were only so many drops of water in the rain.

“Shouyousei…"

She turned to look, and then couldn't quite grasp what she was seeing. A convoluted mass of emotion and soul, struggling to bind itself down to some semblance of a corporeal form… was that Nikolak?

“Yes." With a relived sigh, the entity abandoned the effort, dissipating back into a vortex of energy and thought. “I would make a manifestation for you to talk with, Kalokin's always lecturing me on that, but I… I just can't ever get one to stick."

Shou nodded. She recalled the half dozen unfinished paintings in her art room, and likened the idea to her. It was difficult to finish one piece when so many ideas called to you.

“Curious… I wouldn't have made that comparison, but you're not incorrect." The mass drifted over and looked out into the rain with her. “And you recognized me, even in your dream state."

Shou shrugged. Dreams rarely made sense. It struck her then that she could understand Nikolak as a voice, as ideas… wasn't she supposed to be mute?

“I… I am fractured, Shou. It's different… it's being incapable of thought, of logic, of rationality. It's existing purely as emotion. Luckily, dreams are exempt from logic and thought, they are an inversion of awakening. Humans, so used to thinking, find it difficult to understand even themselves in their dreams, but it's the only place where I can find any semblance of conversation. As with any dream though, neither of us will really remember this when you awake."

That made as much sense as anything else did, she supposed. She stared out into the rain for some time, grateful for the company, for the moment. It wasn't the answer to her nightmare, but it was better than being alone.

“I'm glad you seem to like my company… I was only going to observe your dreams, but as the matron of nightmares, I know a few things about dispelling them."

Her? The Matron of Nightmares? What exactly did that mean?

“It means I'm a demon, Shou, or I'm the closest thing to a demon as exists in this world. The Stráž are each strengthened by a particular emotion… mine is fear."

Shou could feel the waves of guilt rolling off of her despite her inexperience. Mixed with that guilt was something else. Disdain? Loathing? Whatever it was, it wasn't healthy.

“And it's healthy for you to bombard yourself with thoughts degrading yourself? When the giants call to ask you what you're worth, how will you answer them?"

Shou couldn't honestly say she understood the question, but steadfastly insisted that if Nikolak was going to save her from herself, then she'd return the favor. Besides, fear was fun! That's what horror movies were about, right?

Nikolak chuckled softly and shook her head. “Your people are just full of surprises…"

They stared into the rain again, as Shou's thoughts started to drift back to her nightmare. She was only dimly aware of herself, but she had the nagging sensation that she was, in fact, alone in her bed. Khaesho was going to leave her, wasn't he?

“Khaesho is… troubled, by many things. The title of Vash weighs heavily on his shoulders. He thinks you could never understand him."

That wasn't a no. Wicked thoughts rustled in the bushes in the rain, leering at her. Waiting. Except, what emerged from the bushes was a reflection of Shouyousei herself, wreathed in Nikolak's power.

“You… a Vash? Shouyousei, I don't know what to say."

It seemed like quite the idea. She and Nikolak could lean on each other, and she'd be able to better understand Khaesho's struggles. And while she justified it with these noble intentions, she couldn't deny the fact that she desperately wanted some assurance that Khaesho couldn't just vanish from her life, and take the magic of the world with him. He was just so vibrantly alive… she wanted to live like he did. When his adventure took him away from her bustling city, she wanted to run away with him.

“Shou, you're not thinking clearly… in fact, you're not thinking at all. That's your heart speaking, not your mind."

She'd followed her heart this far, and saw no reason to stop now. Nikolak regarded her curiously, but Shou knew she'd already decided. She understood the nightmare's soul well enough to read her, and that more than anything was what tipped the scales.

“Very well, Vash'Shouyousei. I accept."

Shouyousei smiled and bounced over to hug her. A thought struck her, and she tensed momentarily. Was this going to hurt?

“On the contrary Shou, I rather think you'll enjoy it…"