“Ah! Canterlot! The capital of culture, refinement, luxury and
taste. It's been so long since we've been here, hey Fluer De Lis? You can't say you haven't missed it at all. The
adoring fans. The balls. The concerts. The plays. It's positively invigorating!"

Fluer De Lis didn't answer,
preferring to stare out the window of the carriage.

“What's the matter? You haven't
spoken a single word since-“

“Oh, forget you, Shine!" she
snapped at her manager. “Where in Tartarus's name were you? I've been driven
around this forsaken city, all alone mind you, for six hours, making stops at
market places and second-rate venues the entire time!"

“You…weren't alone." Shine Finder
said nervously. “You had your bodyguard Bulk with you the entire time."

“Oh, you know what I mean!" she
scoffed. “He's barely suitable company for somepony such as I!"

“Well at least I'm here now!"

“Yeah…what a relief."

She turned again to the window,
continuing her sulk session. Shine Finder, a light blueish stallion with a
slicked back mane, moved in his seat uncomfortably.

“So? Where were you?" she said
without even the thought of turning to him.

“I had some business to attend to."

“Business?"

“Yes. Business."

She made an incoherent sound. “Aph!
Business? What kind of business? I am your business! What could be more
important that making sure all my needs are fulfilled?"

“Are your needs unfulfilled?"

“No. But that isn't the point!"

Shine Finder let out an exhausted
sigh. “What is the point then?"  

“The point…" she began with the most
condescending tone she could muster “…is that I am not enjoying myself. This
place has never been worse!"

“You're exaggerating." He waved his
hoof at her. “Besides. You will soon change your attitude when you hear that I
managed to get you a ticket to Marquis Claret Yen's masquerade ball tonight."

She huffed.

“You aren't excited?" he asked,
curious and disappointed.

“The Marquis's balls have gone
downhill, as well as the entire city."

“Mmm…what makes you say that? You
haven't been to one in quite some time-"

“I was at the last one." She cut
him off. “He has started inviting griffins and changelings to his little
gatherings."

“Is…that a problem?"

“No, not at all. If you like
degeneracy and barbarism" she answered with annoyance.

“His balls have always been a bit
on the…lecherous side…"

“Oh, you know what I mean!" she
snapped once more. “The entire capital has gone to the dogs ever since they
started welcoming griffins and changelings and hippogriffs with open hooves!"
she turned once more to the window. “It won't be long soon and we will all
start eating off the ground and engaging in tribal orgies in the middle of the
street."

Shine Finder coughed uncomfortably.
“As I said…the balls are a bit…unsavory at times." He rubbed the back of his
neck. “Where is all this coming from anyway?"

Fluer De Lis didn't answer. She
didn't see the need to. She knew that she had a point. And she knew Shine
Finder could see it. That new princess, Twilight Sparkle, was going to destroy
pony society by the end of the year.

“You know, Fleur, you should be
careful with those statements. We don't need any more controversies on our
hooves. Things could get ugly pretty quickly."

Fleur straightened up. “Forget I
said anything. I'm a professional. I can deal with all this. Where's our next
stop?"

“Last stop for the day. A new yak
restaurant-“

“Oh, for fuck's sake!"

“Fleur, don't be like that."

“It's a damn yak restaurant!"

“Listen. I'm going to give you five
minutes to drop all this racist crap. Understand?"

She huffed and stayed silent, her
scowl unchanging.

“Besides. The place has received
great reviews! It's the talk of the town! All you need to do is make an
appearance, get yourself a salad or whatever they have and we can go."

“Fine, fine. I won't make a big
deal out of it…I'm a professional."

“Indeed, you are." Shine Finder
smiled with a click of his tongue accompanied by a wink.

“I just hope the Marquis still has
stocks of his personal rose wine."

“Undoubtably, he will."

Their trek through the city streets
continued in silence, with the occasional mundane question by Shine Finder and
the reluctant answer given. It had been a long day. A day filled to the brim
with visiting museums and restaurants she had been to an uncountable number of
times, all so she could fulfill her contractual obligations, greet fans and
take photos with celebrities towards who she had lukewarm feelings at best and
utterly despised at worst. At least the day was coming to a close.

The carriage went on through the
paved roads, turning here and there, crossing main roads, side roads and
finally entering the back alleys of the capital. Fluer didn't expect much.

“We're here!" Shine exclaimed as
the carriage parked.

Shine Finder jumped out of the
carriage, Fluer following behind. Almost running, he went down the street,
turning corners and passing by all manner of shops and stalls, Fluer barely
managing to keep up.

It felt like they were going in
circles and at some point Fluer completely lost sight of her manager. She
thought she saw him go down that alley. Was that him going through the tunnel?
Maybe he went left here? That was his shadow to the right, wasn't it? It got
darker and darker. Figures. A yak opening a restaurant in the cheapest possible
location. Still, there were no other ponies here. She just might have gotten
lost. There was a light at the end of that path over there.

She quickened her pace. It finally
got brighter. And warmer. Very warm. It was only natural for a tunnel to get
very warm, but the air was dry as well. Very strange.

Amidst the illuminated cobble halls,
she stepped with a weary trot. She was most definitely lost now. She couldn't
really go back the way she came, since she didn't know from where she came.
Still, at least she had the excuse to not go to the restaurant.

She continued on, a certain sense
of disgust overshadowing her weariness. A disgust brought forth by all the mold
around the corners, the greenish puddles she had to walk around and the
occasional rat that would scatter into the holes in the wall.

But then something caught her eye.
A gold piece. Yes, gold. Bits were mostly copper with a very low percentage of
gold mixed in there. And, to what might seem like a surprise to most of her
fans, she had a very extensive knowledge of metallurgy. Mostly so she could
spot fake jewelry, but it had slowly grown into a sort of hobby.

She continued on, levitating the
gold piece by her side. And then she saw another coin. And soon after one more.
Next, she saw three. Then five. Then a pile. Then a mound. And finally, what
could be described as a hill.

“Damn."

Gold. Jewels. Coffers bursting with
coin. Ornamented goblets. Luxurious trinkets and fine necklaces.

Somepony had quite the stash here.
Could be the lair of bandits. But no bandit would simply hoard his treasure.
Rather, he'd most likely spend it all in the tavern.

Flur's neck hair stood on edge when
she heard a rattling from the piles of treasure. She slowly stepped back as the
gold mounds shifted. She gulped. Gold coins slid as something emerged from the
mountain. Something large. Something angry.

“Who steps in my domicile?" a
grizzly voice spoke.

“Oh." Flur exhaled with relief.

A red dragon, five times her size,
stood atop of his hoard of treasure. With yellow eyes filled with malice it
gazed over the white unicorn.

“Who are you, marauder, and what
are you doing in my lair?"

“You're joking, right?" Flur said
with a scoff. “You don't know me?"

“I do not indulge myself in the political
games of the overworld. So speak now before my patience runs out and I gore you
on the spot."

“Wow. Rude." She clicked her
tongue. “I am Fluer De Lis – the most famous supermodel in Equestria."

“Supermodel?" the dragon
questioned.

“Yes. You do know what a supermodel
is, right? Even dragons can't be that uncultured than to not know simple
words."

The dragon grit his teeth. “Your
tongue is quite loose for one so small. I suggest you be more respectful when
in the presence of one with true power-“

“Oh, please!" she cut him off.
“Power-shmaller. I see dragons everyday, twice as big as you and with much less
sass. Get a grip."

“You lie!" the dragon roared with
anger. “No dragon would ever speak with one such as you, much less do it on the
daily!"

“A-are you serious? How long have
you been here? Do you even know what year it is?"

“Vetramar is ancient! I am the
baron of the Dustlands, arch-duke of the boneyards of Krowl! Sorcerer-king of
the eternal gardens! Time is fluid for one such as me. Your mere existence is
just a speck of a speck in comparison to my life."

“Ahaaa…" she droned. “So…you are
saying that you don't know that there are dragons in Canterlot? They have been
basically integrated into pony society."

“Pfa! More lies! No dragon would
stoop so low-“

“How can you not know that? This
area has been renovated countless times for the past fifty years. How long have
you been living here?"

“I have ruled over this land for a
millennium at the least, child. My rulership has been both-“

“That's impossible. What have you
been eating here?"

“Rats and mushrooms mostly" the
dragon said with a subdued tone.

Flur looked around. There a few rat
skeletons lying around. And there was a pile of mushrooms growing in the corner.
It was slowly starting to make sense.

“Right. You're insane."

“Vetramar is nothing of the like!"

“You've been living in a sewer,
barely eating anything of value and getting high on wall fungus. Your brain has
turned to jelly."

“The arrogance of you! My mind is
sharp as ever! Best you leave my domain, before I smite thee!"

“Oh, trust me, I would gladly leave
this dump if I knew the way out! I'm so sick of all the sludge everywhere, the
rats, the smell of feces, the fucking heat! Point me the way out and I'm gone.
You can rule your fucking imaginary kingdom of dead rats and brain rot!"

“You really wear my patience thin.
But Vetramar is a merciful lord. There!" The dragon raised his claw, pointing
to a tunnel. “That path will lead you to the overworld. Now leave, before I
change my mind, little whelp!"

“Pff. Good riddance." Flur said and
she trotted off. “God damn, fucking, shroomhead lizard fuck."

The dragon's eye twitched.

“Little unicorn, please do tell,
have you ever had a sunburn before?"

“What?" she turned, annoyed at the
question.

“It's a simple question. Have you
ever had a sunburn before?"

She narrowed her eyes and turned
towards the exit once more.

“I do not allow my beauty to be so
easily diminished. I've never had a sunburn, no. And I don't plan to." She
trotted forward, scoffing at the notion.

The dragon took a deep breath and
spewed out a torrent of flame. Or so he believed. The years living underground
and unhealthy eating as well as the excessive use of wall fungi has left his
flame quite weak. But it was strong enough to do the job.

Fluer De Lis ran screaming, her butt
set ablaze. She ran and she ran for what felt like hours to tone of the
dragon's laughter. Galloping through the tunnels, she saw a light at the top of
stony steps. She ran up the stairs, hitting a wall, bursting out of a bunker,
running through a busy street, leaving behind her a trail of smoke and some
very confused bystanders.

The moment she laid eyes on it, the
dashed straight to the fountain in the square, jumping inside and extinguishing
the flame. A quick moment of cool relief, as she finally finds peace of mind.
And then came the pain from the burns. Without much thought and still in shock,
she climbed on top of the fountain and sat on a water jar spewing water, held
by a mighty herculean earth pony made of bronze. The water was much colder at
the source and did grant her the relief she sought.

“Hey! Isn't that Fluer De Lis!"

Oh, fuck.

A crowd started gathering around
the fountain taking pictures and yelling out questions at the unicorn. And
there he was - Shine Finder. Looking as confused as anyone else around.

First thing she would do tomorrow
is put out a complaint to the police for assault and squatting.

First thing she would do tonight
was get hammered at the ball.