It was over. University was over.

Tom drank the water with a big smile on his face. Tonight was festive. A drunk Octo was even dancing with a drunk Kevin in the living room whilst being cheered on by the others. Tom didn't want to be drunk, though; he still wasn't sure about putting alcohol into his body. He was still recovering so he wasn't taking any chances. The pain was mostly gone and his vision was much better now, but once in a while, he found himself reaching for a chair to sit down.

Sitting on the small stairs between the patio and the backyard, the wolf put his paper cup away. Next to him, Lucas finished his beer with a big smile on his face. “Ahh, that's some good stuff!"

“Don't get drunk now." The wolf chuckled.

“We are getting drunk!" The coyote laughed and put his hand on the wolf's shoulder. “Nah, I'm not that drunk."

“I'll believe it when I see it."

“No, buddy, I'm not that drunk!" Lucas ruffled his fluff. “But you don't drink, eh? Still recovering from that, don't take any chances." He paused, then after a few moments, the coyote continued. “So, what's the plan?"

“What's what plan?"

“Your plan after graduation?"

“Oh," Tom let out a sigh and looked away. “Maybe I… I don't know. I guess I… I'll get a job."

“Seriously? You didn't plan anything?"

“Lah I graduated just three weeks ago."

“Okay, okay, here. Take this from someone who left home and now lives in another city." The coyote laughed, then pulled the wolf closer. “You get a job, you get a place to live. Then, three or five or whatever years later, you marry someone or continue to the second strata."

“You already planned your marriage?"

“Well uh, not yet." Lucas scratched his nape.

“In a rush to get married?"

They looked behind and saw Vilkas walking into the backyard. The husky drank from his paper cup, then sat down next to Lucas.

“Uh, I dunno. You, Tom?"

“Honestly it's in the far back of my mind."

“Me too, actually."

They chuckled. Tom hated that Lucas was right. He needed a place to live and a job, well just a job now. He was considering continuing his work in his intern company. The pay was pretty nice for a fresh graduate. Besides, for someone whose spending was very low like him, it was more than great.

Then, he needed to find someone.

Yeah, university was over now. His friends are going back home. Martin, Lucy, and James were going home soon. They planned to hang out for the last time before then. While James was going away next week too, it didn't really bother him as much as Martin and Lucy because the tiger's home was only in the next province.

As for Max… he didn't know when would Max go. The shepherd didn't even speak about going home. Last week, Max, Octo, and some more spent some time in his apartment, taking care of him. Sadly, he was recovering so he couldn't talk much. The dog treated him very carefully, like he might break any minute. Well, Tom himself felt like he might break any minute, so he was glad.

He knew it would happen eventually, but a part of him didn't want it. On one hand, he understood that their time was limited and he had to let go of Max eventually. They could still chat and meet up from time to time, but it would feel different. On the other hand…

He spent last night awake in bed, wondering if he had any chance of being with the shepherd. It was impossible, he knew, but he prayed to whomever was willing to listen to him to allow them to be together. It wasn't much, but…

Who was he kidding?

“I'm gonna refill my cup." Lucas then stood up.

Vilkas gave him his cup. “Refill mine too."

Shortly after Lucas left, the man of his dreams came in. Max sat down next to him, almost silently. “Why are you two here? Kevin is trying to pick up Nathan over there, again." he said with a chuckle.

“Seriously? I gotta see that." Vilkas laughed, then stood up and walked inside.

With Vilkas gone, Max drank his beer and wiped his mouth. “So, I finally graduate." He grinned at Tom.

Tom looked at him, then at the door, then back at him again. “Did you really just shoo Vilkas away?"

“Who can blame me when I want to be with you?"

The wolf looked away as he turned red. Max laughed as his tail wagged, then wrapped his arm around the wolf's shoulder. “We've graduated now, don't you dare be awkward 'round me. Besides, anything you wanna say?"

“You speak it like it's a farewell party."

“It is! Stephan is leaving tomorrow, Nathan next week."

“Are you… are you leaving too, Max?" he asked softly.

The dog stroked his shoulder. “Yeah. I'm leaving tomorrow."

So, tonight was their last night, then. Tom looked at the sky and considered his options. Did he want to tell him and risk destroying their friendship on the last day they met?

He let out a sigh. When one fully trusted someone, in the end there would be two answers: either one would get a lifelong companion or a lifelong lesson. He had let Max go for the world to decide, and Max came back. Whatever their relationship would become, it was the best for him.

“So, if you have anything to say, just tell me. Whatever it is, I promise I won't laugh or be angry."

“You… promise that?"

“Pinky promise." The dog smiled at him. “Though, I'm not leaving forever. I plan to move here. I'm just going home for a week, then I got an interview to do here."

Max was serious. As this was their last night being students, he wanted to finish the chapter of university with as many details as he could. He wanted them to finish their university times without any emotional baggage. He wanted them to finish any unfinished business before they began writing another chapter. He knew that there must be something that Tom wanted to say but was too shy to do so.

Honestly, he didn't really have much to say. He wanted to talk about that incident, but it was too risky and too dangerous. Tom was still recovering, and so did he. Who knew what could it bring to their mental state. It still brought him nightmares, but he learnt to accept it as a part of the wolf, no matter how terrifying was that.

Tom did it, and he wondered how did he live knowing that he was a monster. That must take a high level of either insanity or self-acceptance.

Tom had been nothing but terrifying for the past two years, so he trusted him to keep himself in control. Nobody was purely good or purely evil. Not even him; he remembered being the bully during middle school and sometimes during high school. The truth lay somewhere in grey. Although that changed his view of the wolf, at least Tom was still the gentle wolf that he knew. Those whom he killed, Max just thought that they deserved it. He did not know them and it was better to stay that way.

Tom then let out a deep sigh, as if he had decided something and was ready to face all its consequences. The wolf stood up with ears flattened and looked at him, making him do the same.

“B-before I tell you, please, please don't be angry at me or hate me, okay?"

“I won't dude. Don't worry." He smiled at the wolf.

“Um, okay, so…" The wolf looked away and his ears twitched, tail wrapping against his own leg. “Max, t-the first time we met, it was your good looks that made me interested in you."

Max's mind came back to that moment two years ago. He got the info that Tom was the class manager, so he ran to catch up with him before the wolf left the classroom. He still remembered it as if it happened yesterday, the surprised then awestricken look on the wolf's face. It was cute.

“I-it was the first time I… uh… m-met someone as handsome as you. A-and I couldn't help but feel attracted. Then you decided to get closer to me, and I couldn't do anything but do the same.

“We became… even closer and closer, both emotionally and physically. We hung out more often, even stayed over each other's dorms." The tips of the wolf's ears turned red. “E-even snuggling with each other."

Max wanted to comment on it but decided not to. It made him embarrassed, too. Those were things he never did with another guy. And he hated to admit that he liked snuggling with the wolf.

“So, I… I couldn't help but develop feelings for you. B-but before I could act on it, Andy happened and forced us to kiss. You made it clear that you want nothing to do with that, and that made me reconsider my position. I didn't want to overstep any boundaries."

Taking a deep breath, Max looked back at the wolf. Was this really going in that direction? Something rose up in his gut. Before it could slap him on the face, Tom continued.

“But I can't do it anymore." He turned to look at the dog. “It's been two years since I realised it, and now we've finished university. I… I want to at least tell you this. P-please don't be angry or… or hate me."

The wolf took a deep breath and looked away. “Max, I'm gay."

For a moment, all they could hear was the commotion from inside the house. Max stared at the wolf; the wolf didn't look at him. The words slowly dawned on him. Tom was gay. Tom was gay.

Unlike Kevin, Tom didn't come out. For what reason, Max didn't know, but what he understood from the little story before his confession was that Tom came out to him because Tom… liked him. He had a suspicion, but now that it turned out to be true, he didn't know what to do. Octo told him that Tom was crushing on someone, and now he knew whom.

Now… it all made sense. All those touches, all those snuggles, all those cheesy lines he thought the wolf was just practising his pick-up skills, they were real and for him. They were not mere innocent words. Back then, Tom dared kiss him because he wanted to. The guilt when he withdrew from the wolf after the kiss multiplied tenfold. If Tom had been liking him since they first met, then no doubt that hurt him a lot.

But, despite all that, Max felt happy. From what he could tell, Tom never came out to anyone. He was the first one he came out to, and despite his sharp words about homosexuals, Tom still came out to him first. That alone proved just how much Tom trusted him. That made him happy. Tom was gay, and somehow that made him happy.

Max stared at the grey wolf, trying to keep his expression straight whilst inside he was screaming in confusion. Why was he feeling happy that Tom was gay? Had he involuntarily been wishing for that? Was he really not as straight as he thought? Why was he jealous of the others when they got to be close with Tom? Was it really that… that… all this time, he too developed feelings for the wolf?

Maybe he too had some ulterior motive for having done those things with the wolf. They cuddled, they kissed, they did things that he would never do with another man. Was he comfortable with those things because he was bi without him knowing?

Tom still didn't look up and his ears were still down. Max realised that even though they tried to support each other, they hurt themselves and each other by doing so. They hurt each other for being blind to their feelings. Max was too proud and terrified to admit that he might be bi. Tom was too anxious to admit that he was gay.

Yet, despite what happened, it all didn't matter now. He was the one who told the wolf to tell him anything. He should be ready for this. Tom dared take the risk of losing him by being honest. He should also dare take the risk.

“That's the coming out part." Max smiled softly at the wolf, steeling his confidence. Tom trusted him. Now, it was Max's turn to trust himself in turn. “Now where's the confession part?"

Tom looked at him in surprise, his ears still red. “W-what?"

Max just shrugged. “You pretty much said you liked me. How about making that clear?"

“I-I…" he looked away again.

“Well, that is if you want to." He chuckled sheepishly. He could do it himself, but he still wasn't sure about his own feelings. Tom doing it might be better.

This time, Tom tried to look at him and said bashfully. “Max, I like you."

“There you go!" Max walked to the wolf with a big smile and ruffled his head fur. Tom yelped at first but found himself leaning into the other's touch. Even then, Tom still didn't touch him; he only stood there with an anxious smile on his face.

No use regretting what happened. Now, he should stand up again and admit it. “Now, are you going to ask me out or something?" Max grinned, trying not to make the situation awkward. This was already making Tom fluster, so he should keep the air welcoming.

Tom shoved him away, embarrassment clear on his face. “W-what?!"

“Come on, nobody escapes my charm." He wiggled his eyebrows. “'Sides, you get the honor of being the first guy to ask me out and making me consider it."

“You're really taking pleasure out of this, aren't you?"

“I'm not!" The dog laughed. “So?"

The wolf only stared at him incredulously, then looked away, then took a deep breath and looked back at him. “Max, do you want to be my boyfriend?"

Max laughed at that, almost pushing the wolf away.

“W-what?! I asked you out and you bloody laughed?!"

“Hahaha not that!" He calmed down and grinned at him. “I was kinda expecting you to ask me out on a date, but well I guess that works."

Tom was red again.

“Anyway," His grin turned into a soft smile. Was he ready to see the wolf in a different light? Even if he really were a bisexual, was he ready to go out with a guy? It certainly would be a new experience, but… “I can't answer now, please give me a week."

Letting out a long, relieved sigh, Tom looked up and smiled back, his ears finally going up. “Yeah, i-it's okay. Thank you, Max... for not pushing me away."

“I swear this time I will answer you and not leave you like last time. What I can do now, though…"

Max took hold of Tom's muzzle. Tom looked at his hand, then at his eyes. Despite its unnatural and otherworldly hue, he found it… beautiful. He might look like he was a literal hellhound, but this hellhound was a kind-hearted, soft-spoken one. He had a terrifying and lethal side, Max knew, but this hellhound, this bad wolf was more than he could ask.

Daring to accept that he might like Tom too, Max leant down a bit and slowly brought their muzzle closer, and their lips met.

It felt exactly like that moment in Octo's dorm. They just stayed there, lips meeting lips. Max sensed hesitation on Tom's part, so he put his hands on the wolf's sides, telling him that it was okay. He didn't want to rush anything, Tom was soft, and he wanted to take things slow. The dog then hugged the wolf and brought him closer, their bodies almost touching. Tom's hand went up and rested on his chest.

So, he kissed a guy and he liked it.

The kiss was gentle. Tom was soft, warm, inviting despite his vulnerabilities. His body felt solid, unlike a woman; he might need to get used to it now.

Then they pulled back. Max didn't let Tom go, though, he nuzzled the wolf's head, occasionally giving small licks. Tom chuckled a bit but eventually did the same with his neck. This apparently felt nice.

“Congratulations on being my first kiss with a dude." He said as he pulled away, stroking the grey wolf's fluff.

“Wasn't… wasn't that kiss at Octo's dorm… your first with a dude?" The wolf replied, his voice almost wavering.

“Well… right. But this one I started it."

Tom looked down. “N-no regrets?"

“Definitely no regrets." He pushed the wolf away but held his hand. “And since it's a party, why don't we party?"

“…that… came out wrong."

“Doesn't matter." Max's hands moved the wolf's hand to his shoulders. “So, let's dance." His hands went to the wolf's waist. “Come on, don't be embarrassed. You get to feel my muscles now."

Tom shoved him, but Max didn't budge and just laughed.

“I'm starting to think you're too insufferable."

“Oh? I am?"

Then, Tom looked at him right on the face with a determined grin. Although, it was kind of hard to take him seriously with his lowered ears. “As insufferable as Kevin."

“Excuse me, I'm offended!"

“You should be." Tom then moved, starting the dance. The music from inside was muffled from here, but they weren't dancing to it anyway.

Slowly, they followed each other's movement. They almost stepped on each other's foot sometimes, but they managed. Max looked at the wolf's eyes, feeling happy. He was considering being his boyfriend anyway, so he'd better get used to this.

Funny, he thought. A few years ago, he would've turned down the idea of dancing with a guy, yet here was he. Not only was he dancing with a guy, but he was also considering being boyfriends with a guy. Their sexual activity came to mind, but Max pushed it away. No thinking about anything now. There were only the two of them, being close, comfortable with each other, trusting each other.

Tom then rested his head on the dog's chest, taking a deep breath with his ears going down. “I exist." He said softly.

Max took a deep breath, the wolf's scent filling his nose. “You exist, Tom. I'm here, I'm real. You're not broken. You're here." He closed his eyes as he held him close. Tom was exposing his vulnerabilities, and he wanted to protect him from everything. “You exist."

Tom hugged him back, his voice wavering, almost sobbing. “I… I exist…"

FINALLY WTF TOM IT TOOK YOU 48 CHAPTERS WTFH

Sorry it was kind of short, I wanted to write more from Octo's perspective but I didn't want to ruin their moment. So this chapter is only for them!

Fun fact: The title of this chapter is based on an Indonesian proverb which goes something like, "When you fully trust someone, in the end there will be two answers: either you will get a lifelong companion or a lifelong lesson". I thought it was romantic (and realistic) so I use it.