Two pieces of paper each day, half a jar of ink is all I have. It might not be enough for all I want to write, or it just might do fine. At least I have something to write on now, my last place of ‘employment’ had little room for anything fancy like paper, personal space, or anything but the bare necessities to keep one alive. I, well as a human in draconic civilization it comes to no surprise that I am one of the many slaves. Two pieces of paper a day, and I waste it on a few meaningless words. How it all started, well it started in the mines.

The mines, hot, sweaty, and dirty. The mines where the place most slaves worked, and most slaves died. We had to chop down the rocks, load it into carts and move it to the surface. I should be lucky I did not work in the coal mines but in the iron mine. I did not have to deal with the deadly mine gas those in the coal mines had to deal with. The routine was easy, wake up at the sound of the dinner bell, eat a nasty goo that can best be described as mushed rats, in hind sight, it might have been. Then a long hard day of work down into the mines. There was a hierarchy among the slaves, the weaker pushed the carts, the strong mined. And I was incredibly strong, part of what my mother gave me. Oh, I forgot to mention, my mother was a dragon, so yeah. That was something that bite me in the butt from time to time. I had to learn magic to hide my eyes, dragon eyes would give me an ‘accident’ in the mines from the other slaves. A public execution of me and my mother when the dragons discover. My father, a slave, died before I was born. I inherited his facial features, the memories of my mother spoken clear of them. Another little point I properly should not talk about but still will, the way that a dragon mother teaches her child with memories genetically given to them. My genetic memories where incomplete, hard to access and even harder to decipher. If it was because I was part human or that my mother had little time to concentrate, I could only guess.

The draconic features hidden under the human skin made me rank up among the human slaves. I worked in the mines for twenty years, ever since I was a child. Yet I did not show the usual wears that the other slaves shown. The oldest of the mine was reaching forty years old, and he was weak. He could only push the empty cards and without doubt he would be taken away and replaced soon. No one knows what happened with the slaves who were taken away. Through the fact that our food contained some more meat the day after hinted to  something. It should go without telling that every slave her hated the dragons, everyone but me. It was hard to hate the dragons when the memories of a dragon flood through your mind. I know why the humans are slaves, do I agree how long the humans have been slaves? No, But I agree that the punishment it correct. Do I feel imprisoned? Enslaved? No, well a bit but not imprisoned.

I can use the same magic dragon’s use, trough it was not developed. I mostly used it to shape my body so my draconic features where hidden. It made me realise something that had kept me sane for so long; I am only as enslaved as I allow myself to feel enslaved. So I gave myself a mission; to find my mother. Time to feel and run into the wide world!? Guess, no. that would get me killed, no I had a better idea, work my way up the ranking. For the past twenty years I delved the rocks as hard as my body allowed me, when the guards where watching even harder. Without showing any sign that I was getting weaker I would soon be noticed.

My counter hit twenty five years old, that was when my life changed, out of the mines. There was a new opportunity for loading the trucks. Every single slave wanted it, out in the fresh air. It’s said that one that worked the loading docks could even life for fifty years. The slaves all raised their hands to be picked, the draconic mine owner must have a god-complex. The way he looked down at us, the way he judged and executed slaves. Yes a god-complex.

I simply had to walk forwards, my taller than usual posture allowed me to stand up and push the others aside. I was the only one not shouting for the job, I was the only one not begging not I was looking up at my draconic master. And thus I was allowed to move up from the mines towards the loading docks.

I never forget that first contact with fresh air, the sun down on my skin. It felt wonderful, I felt free, just for a moment. Then I had no choice but to work and load the trucks. Dragons, dragons like efficiency so when loading the trucks I had to use machines to help me move bigger loads. Soon enough I learned myself to drive an nice yellow front loader. It made me wonder why they even still used slaves in the mines, couldn’t they do the same with just a few slaves and lots of machines?

What no one told me was the amount of dragons I had to interact with, mostly the truck drivers. They loved to have some human slave to help them with every wish. I soon learned that they were low on the social ladder. No personal slaves or no extra help, and there I was helping them load the truck. The only truck driver who even had experience with slaves was the one coming from the palace. He came by once a month, requesting a load of coal and driving off again. I once dared him in my politest way to ask why all the coal, he answered me like a teacher would scull a child. “For the royals to warm their scales” apparently hot coals was used as some kind of spa, laying on them to heat the scales and care for the body.

The month after that I asked him about more of the dragon society and how personal slaves worked. I was like a child asking for more information and after half a year I was rewarded for my actions. “Why you ask so many questions slave” He asked me. I could only tell him the truth that I was curious how other slaves lived. Okay you know now it was part of the truth yet it worked. He walked off towards the head miners office. It was a longest half an hour of my live.  Truth be told was that I expected to be executed for asking questions. Disrespecting a dragon, yet in the end I learned. For a royal slave, interest in dragons was a must and so I ended up here, among the royal slaves. That day I was pushed into the truck, my collar was taken off and for a moment I was no longer a slave. For the duration of the trip I could watch the dragon’s society. Flying, walking, driving cars. It helped me to place some of my genetic memories. I just hoped I could find my mother at all between the chaos. I did not know my mother’s face, I only knew the deep purple of her scales.  My mother taught me taught me through the memories that I would know my mother when I saw her. And I hoped so, every single purple dragon I saw caught my interest.

Then we arrived and I was collar again, a nice golden collar to show of my new status. A royal slave, a nice upgrade. I now have a whole five square meters for myself, I am expected to wash myself every day. I still have to work hard, because every human slave group has a hierarchy. Some hierarchy that is beyond what I encountered before. As soon as I arrived they already inspected me and guided me to the small centre place where they ate their food, gotten dressed and prepared for the day. They talked to me, down to me actually. You would think then being a slave would kill their echo. Yet I have been proven wrong before.

First class brainwashing is what I could call it, they worshiped the Queen of the dragons like a goddess, and the dragons like the children of a goddess. No wonder they were the perfect slaves, they thrown speeches about the greatness of the dragons that any propaganda artist would be envious of. The end of their little speech the message was clear, I was not destined to even ever meet the Queen or any of the royal dragons. He was, a loader. I could shake my head at this, trade a fancy collar but the same damned work. Just in reverse. It was hard for me to even think about the dragons as some kind of deity when I came out of one. When I had the somatic memory of a big deep purple scaled dragon who helped me into this world.

First day after admission, the morning was slow compared to the mines. Food was better trough, it contained real meet this time. Not that it was much more than the bare necessities. After food, something not like the mines, cleaning. I observed while cleaning, the bath house was small, like the room and the common room. The slaves formed a community, washing each other yet I was left alone. Not that I minded, for the first time I had not to be afraid of someone unknown touching me.

Work, unloading the first truck that came into the docking. Kneeling to the trucker as usual then unloading the items. Food, food that I never seen before, whole animals at the same time. Trucks came and went the whole day. One must say that the most effective way to learn about who lurks over you, by the trucks that go into the house. It was a festive day today, The amount of flight cases I had to move cleared that, the amount of food that moved into the palace made it a big one. I had to get an excuse to get up there, among the servants to serve to food. If my mother was a high strung dragon, a big change was that she was among the guests.

It was early in the evening went the trucks stopped coming and the dock was recommissioned as special entrance for the artists and performers. The party was going to happen in a two hours, that was the time more likely less that I had to get to be among the servants. With my work done for the day, I had to move back towards the common room. The other slaves where already there. “Matt” The ‘leader’ called out to me. The long blonde man, I remember the detail of his nose ridge now I think about it. A strange cut along his nose. I moved forwards, looking straight at him “You are in luck, first day as one of us and you get to meet the sons of goddess.” Luck as it would seem, dealt me a card today that I would not deny. “And what would be my task as to serve the sons of the goddess” my reply, served to smooth to their believe system, as long as I was not one of them, I would not gain full access. His reply came with an highness that should not be expected from a slave. “You poor the drinks for us to serve. You stay in the kitchen the whole time. You do as you are told by the children of the goddess who cook. You understand, if you slip up I will personally punish you. Three hundred whips with a scale tail” I couldn’t help but give a small chuckle. “I have worked in the mines for a long time, then the docks. If I hit a rock wrong I would get the whip, if I looked at the children of the goddess wrong, I get the whip. You should not worry about me.” I gotten an foul look from the leader. Yes I have done it, getting on their bad side, yet I cared little. Honestly the idea that I might see the dragon who gave live to me filled my system with a feeling that was beyond my comprehending.

The night, it came quicker than I would have liked. I uncorked the first fancy blood whine, wine made from cow’s blood and fruit. It took two tries, before I perfectly pour each single glass and send it on the way. A few times I helped with the different fried meat dishes from the cooks. I moved along the kitchen like I was never there. The cooks often where surprised when a dish was suddenly ready. I enjoyed the fact of being invisible, being there without their notice. Then suddenly someone entered the kitchen and a voice spoke, a strangely familiar one. For a moment I wanted to look up but then I saw the reaction of the cooks and other dragons, it was best I did not. “My queen” I could hear the chef speak. Immediately I remembered the only useful part of the speech I gotten when I arrived. The kitchen muffled when the queen spoke again. “I came here to say you all did a good job.” I could hear the dragoness walk along the kitchen. “Thank you my queen.” I could hear the chef speak again. The steps came even closer to me, next to me for the fact. And all I see was the floor, dirty from the action of tonight. The clawed feet where dressed in the finest material, I hardily recognise it. Then I hear more words, spoken to someone, a slave. It took me a moment to realise that those words where spoke to him “Rise, Slave.” I slowly stood up, nervous, did I do something wrong. This was the queen after all, she would not see me for just a chit chat, right. I could see the fine clothing on her body, yet he seen little her scales. I did not dare to look up and take a look from her scales, maybe her hands? I looked to the side, her clawed hand free from fabric. “Look up slave I want to look in your eyes.” He could do little but to look in the queens eyes. Her deep purple scales, it made his whole spine shake. “Lovely shade of eyes” the queen said. “Trough I doubt they come natural to you” she looked away again, forcing me to drop to the ground again.

Later that evening I was called back to the common room, the other slaves all happy. “The children of the goddess praised us” Was the common word. “Her direct children.” I hesitated at first but when they became cocky again, looking down on me; I spilled the beans. “The goddess spoken to me” I watched in anticipation how their mouths fell over open. Gazing at me as I told them their ‘goddess’ spoke to me. “She told me to stand up and look into her eyes.” Lair was the response I gotten, like I would joke around with being spoken to by a queen. “Liar?” I smilled to them “Why would I risk lying about the goddess. I value my live too much to lie and get executed. But if you don’t trust me, please go ahead and ask the goddess” The response I gotten from them was sour and thus I moved to my own personal room. Some privacy was welcome.

It has been two weeks since I last could write down my thoughts. Not by the lack of paper but by the lack of time. The other slaves game me the time of the day. Even when the loading docks where not used all day and that the royal slaves had no room to complain. I estimated that we gotten free time for at least five hours a day. Just sitting in the common room awaiting command. A younger women, she was early twenty years old, born as a slave for the higher social dragons. Was around me for the greater time of the day. She wanted to know about the goddess but I couldn’t answer most of her question. Besides, I had my own issues to solve. Ever since that meeting with the queen my somatic memories ran overtime, they have been stirred and awakened. A dragon mother always knows her child and her child always knows his mother. Without any previous experience I could do little but to think about how the queen was my mother.

I let that sink in, It is quite possible that the Queen of the dragons is my mother. The Queen of the bloody dragons, the Queen that has been displayed as goddess to most slaves. I was quite distressed, I could not just walk up to the queen and ask her if she gave birth to a half dragon. I would be mad to. Yet I am at a loss on how to play my cards, did she hint me already that she knew? Or is she trying me, am I just being paranoid. Anyway I had not that much time to argue with myself today, A large package was delivered for the Queen. I recognised her name on the package, even when I never heard it before “Quaria.” Sometimes I wish these somatic memories where trying to keep quiet and not sound like alarm bells in my head.  I placed the package in the correct spot on the magazine and called it a day. No more shipments where to come in. Yet as I tried to walk back to the common room and await more work, one of the other slaves came in, the long blonde man. “Go back” he said “You need to bring the package for the goddess to her private quarters and we need to be gone before she is back” I turned back at the package. It was about my height and I did not look forwards to lift it through the whole building. Did I had a choice? Well I was a slave, disobedience would cause me to get the whip at best. “I would love to serve the goddess but this package is rather heavily.” I started, trying to string his believe into my advantage. “Could you help me lift, I wish not to drop it” And he agreed, sometimes I could be rather devious.

We took most of the servant tunnels, away from the palace and the dragons within. Only in the last hall we had to take the hallway. It was large,  the luxurious interiors was nearly beyond my comprehension. Maybe it was not such a farfetched idea that the dragons where gods, If you just believe something long enough…maybe it becomes truth? At least when you lie long enough, I certainly start to lose perspective. I kept on reminding me that my mother was a dragon or I would have followed the royal slaves in their mind of god idea of a dragon. The Queens room was the largest of all the rooms, the door we walked through was beyond compare. Huge, heavily decorated and still light and smooth to open. The Queen bedroom was designed in the same over complex style. My eyes scanned along the room, yes I know I was not supposed to do such a thing. We walked towards the large bed to place the parcel next to it. While we placed the parcel on the ground I could see a simple silver collar like object on the bed side clause. A moment I thought the queen was in some slave like play herself behind closed doors. A thought that quickly was slapped out of my mind.

“Xeriantir” Was written on the collar, the name, yes it was a name. It was my name, my real name that was. I could hardly ever introduce myself to other slaves like that. I was Matt to them. Only three people in the world possibly known of my name; My father who was dead, my mother and of course myself. Was it coincidence? I had no room to think in depth about it, my college slave pulled me back. “Be happy that I don’t punish you for this. Staring at the goddess’s property”

Yes, I was sculled and I did not mind. I turned around walking after the long blond male. After we got back he walked away without no reason. Something that made me a bit nervous, I did not fancy to come on the Queens wrong size by my intentions to find my mother.

When he returned he gave one single glace to me, a glace that told me enough. He spilled the beans, and I know well that I did something that I should not have done. For now, I could do nothing but to wait, wait for the next day to feel my punishment first hand.

It was the day that never came, the next morning I woke up, had the usual food and went to load the trash into the trucks. Trash day was always a busy day for me. The trash just piled up at the different containers, and the trucks all came at the same time. Often I had to toss a container towards the waste truck and run towards a delivery truck to unload. It did compare little to the work I had to do in the mines trough. It was hard, it was not back breaking. During the late hours of the day, the conga line of trucks grinded to a hold. It was another quite evening with little to do, so back to the common room with a sour taste in my maw.

I fantasized about the pain I would feel, the different punishments I seen at the mine, whips, skinning, hair pulling. Heck sometimes even pulling one’s eyes out. Punishments where not only horrible to undergo, they are made to set an example to discuss the other slaves. A scare tactic, an afraid slave does not plot, at least not in the open. The common room was empty, the other slaves where still caught up with something apparently, some quite time would never go amiss even when I still had to get used to it.

When I entered the room I immediately spotted something on my bed. A silver necklace, it was the same one from the other day. Under it a small note, written on fine paper with purple lines, the royal colours. With a shaking hand I pulled the note from under the necklace. It was short it only said “If you understand the word, wear it tomorrow.” the letters where elegant, written by someone experience, refined. I carefully placed the silver necklace on the little nightstand I had next to the bed. The letter I placed next to it, I might need it someday. My head was heavy, my heard was pouncing in my chest. Who ever written this message, gave me a piece of jewellery from the queen. I needed a rest, I needed some sleep, I needed piece of mind from my raging heart and storming mind.

Sleep did not come easily, I did not even dare to guess how late it was before I finally did get to sleep. While normally I would be up in time for the food and the bathing, this time I was called out of bed by an angry voice. I moved quickly barely managing to put on a new shirt for the food. Bathing and then back to get dressed, my mind was still foggy. I was tired, I would have a hard day today, a sleepy mind. I never experienced this anxiety before. I was unsure, I did not know what I wanted. My fingers traced along the silver necklace, closing around it. My world slowed down to a heartbeat when I took up the neckless, bringing it to my neck. I could feel the pounding of my heart trough every fibre of my body.

The metal was cold on my skin, colder than the golden collar. It tingled my skin, the name plate fell on my chest. Like it was meant to be. For a moment I looked in the window, to see the weak reflection of myself. “Xeriantir” I said softly, knowing what it means, my real name. “first of goddess” was the true meaning, now I realised that it might be a sick joke or it’s something more, a meaning behind a meaning. It the somatic memories of my mother told me anything was that the dragons loved riddles, so much that the humans even went to war with them, long time ago. Don’t ask me what or how long ago or what the terrible thing was that the humans did. All I knew was that…

I was running out of time actually. I quickly turned around and walked out of the room. To be met by the long blonde male. He looked at me for a moment, then at my neckless then at me again. “How dare you” he said to me. “How dare you to seal from the goddess” Before I knew I was grabbed by all the slaves at the same time.

“Stay here, you shall be punished” he stormed off, moments later I felt the grip of two scaled claws around my arms. They dug into my flesh drawing blood down my arms. The hotness of my own blood made my skin feel afire. I was not even allowed to stand on my own two feet, head low I was dragged along the floor. The many turns, the long corridors made me lose track of where I was carried towards. Until I could hear two massive doors open and close with an echo. The room I was in sounded huge, throne room huge. “Kneel slave” the guards kicked me in my knee cavities, more blood was drawn and I was forced against the ground.

“My queen” I could hear one of the guards announce to the other in the room. Well the Queen, not all things where cryptic around dragons. “Leave” I could hear her voice, calm, chilled and emotionless. Was I in trouble? Seeing I was bleeding on my knees in front of the dragon queen. Yes I was, neck snapping amount of trouble. “My queen?” the guard sounded surprise. I could almost guess the reply to him “I am the queen of the dragons, a small human slave would be no trouble for me to handle”

Yes, dead on. The guards left soon after, the doors slammed yet again. Leaving me possibly all alone. From my place on the ground I could not see anyone else. I could only count time by my heartbeats, fifty passed before the queen moved. Her footsteps echoed through the hall, Now I knew why she was queen. She was intimidating. She stopped short of me “Stand.” She ordered me, It pained me but I could stand up. My calves warm with blood. I could see her chest an arm’s length away.

A single claw moved over my chest, rising my head with the tip of her sharp claw. I gazed yet again into her eyes, she gazed back into my eyes. She broke the contact to look at the necklace. “How did you get this slave?” her facial expression was calm like her voice. I could not read her emotions, was she about to kill me? Hug me? Kiss me? Fuck me? I could not make sense of it. “I found it with a note on my pillow Mistress. It said I should wear it today if I know what it meant mistress.”

Her voice was still not moved “Explain it to me slave.” I swallowed, I just had to go all in for this. “Xeriantir, it means first of the goddess, Mistress” She nodded “First of the goddess, a name I gave my long dead child” My heart chilled, became cold, Now I write this I know otherwise but that time and moment. I knew I was going to die a slow painful dead. “And why you do not call me goddess like all those slaves?” My mouth was dry when I replied “A old tale really. Would a prey think the hunter to be a god even when the hunter controls live and death? No the prey would be terrified. The same way I look to dragons Mistress. They are powerful, capable to take my life at any moment yet I am not believing a dragon would be god how powerful one might be mistress.” Her look towards me changed for a split second, like she gotten conformation for something. “you know draconic well, yet you never been in our culture. How come slave?” Each word became easier and easier. “I have memories of life before the mines…before I was a slave mistress, How crazy it might be. Mistress.” She nodded, looking at me like I was some puzzle for her, dragons loved puzzles. “Tell me, slave. You remember the other day what I said to you.”

“I never forget it mistress, second day of being a slave and I was spoken to by the queen of the dragons. Mistress, one does not forget.” The queen nodded, gazing with a more stern look at me. “So, slave, I know you have some magical powers. You try to hide something slave so show me those real eyes.” I was already in deep so in for a penny in for a pound. Through the change came not easy to me. I was Matt for a long time, far longer than I was Xeriantir. Once you lie for long enough, your fake identity becomes your real identity. Slowly I started to change my eyes, from the human eyes to bright purple dragon slits.

I gotten an reaction from the queen, a mother always knows her child. It must have been that my eyes were hiding the fact. “Slave, Who you think gave this neckless to you.” My reply, easy, a weight came from my shoulder. “My true mother Mistress.” She tilted her head softly “I gave you that neckless. So you suggest that I am your mother”

“It would conclude to that Mistress.” My voice was all over the place, I was cracking up. I just told the queen of the dragons, the queen for fucks sake that I thought I was her son. Her dead son from what I just learned. She laughed at me, laughed hard at me. “That is one story, quite a strange one slave. No I offered the neckless as an invitation. I miss a private servant for a long time, around twenty years, So I just ordered you to be my servant. I love a good puzzle and while you serve me, I shall unravel you” I swore against myself. My eyes transformed back to the formal self, I was Matt again. “That is wise slave, Your secrete is safe with me.” I gave a soft nod. “Guards!” I could hear her call out, they came into the room. “escort the slave to the private quarters, stop his bleeding and give him the Queen’s slave ropes.” I could feel their burning eyes into my back. And with a grin I walked off, from everything that happened at least I get some payback on those echo centric slaves. I couldn’t wait to see the smile on their face. But for now, my pages are filled and my mistress needs me for tea.

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