War never changes, it never has and it never will

They all go out to fight an enemy because they’re bad

They’re told that they threaten us by not bowing to us

And they don’t question that, they just listen

Their commanders send down orders, telling them to engage

Send out the raining of bombs and artillery on the ground

The screams of the dying civilians below them all

Drowned out by the fighter’s engines

The remains of the country that was razed to hell and beyond

Is now clutched within the grasp of our merciful hands

We’re going to build a new government for you, one of democracy

Since, as you can see, it’s running so well back at home

Well, heck, shouldn’t these cowardly residents be enthralled

We just took down their murderous leader

And absolved them of his terrible tyranny

Now they get to have the hand of America guide them

But while we’re at it, while we rebuild this nation

Let us remind you of our ultimate goal

We’re totally here to help you out, it’s not a guise at all

But now that you have no military, where’s your oil?

What? You don’t want us to have your oil

You’re not appreciative of the fourteen permanent American bases

We have so generously built inside your nation

Yes, we never had permission, but we need to stay around for your security…forever

Years go by, and well, I guess you never really did have any weapons

But all is well, your American friends are here

Kindly performing drug raids, and manning check points, blowing your houses up

Yes, we accidently killed fifteen of you, but we think one of them was a terrorist

Haven’t you heard of how fantastic America is, we’re the land of the free

Well, we were, up until about thirty years ago, but pay that no mind

We’re going to set you guys up great, go and vote for your officials

What the hell? Why’d you vote for them?! No, not allowed, try again

Oh, don’t get mad. Can’t you see how democracy works

We give you the option to vote, and then you vote how we want you to

You don’t like who we chose for you, what do you mean?

We just overthrew your government and put ours in place

But you don’t want our government? You protest our presence

You want us out? But how, we’ve only been here shy a decade

Our involvement here has been purely for your sake

There was absolutely, definitely, no other motive for our arrival

By the way, don’t get too worried about how your military

Can possibly stand up against your neighbor, Iran

For you see, we’re peacefully negotiating with them

Imposing sanctions on their citizens, not blowing them up

Clearly, you can see the improvement, can’t you?

Then again, we aren’t sending another fifteen thousand troops

To Kuwait for any other reason than them wanting to be there

Don’t you know, being deployed is the greatest vacation there is

While we’re at it, please do ignore the new bills we’re passing

We aren’t trying to control the internet with SOPA

Americans knew this, so they protested vehemently against this bill

That was because they wanted a bill that covered the globe, not just them

So, now we have ACTA, which proudly gives internet control to corporations

Yes, the majority of the American people aren’t lucky enough to be in one

But again, you have to realize, this bill is for their own sake

Because they are simply too ignorant to know how much they need it

Oh, wait! Don’t tell me you didn’t hear about the new NDAA we passed either

Well, I guess I can understand it, we were rather silent about it

Didn’t really tell anyone about it when it passed 93-7 in the senate

Blast the damn newspapers for having the gall to disagree with it

Don’t you people understand what democracy is all about?

Being a patriot means you always support what I want

What I say goes, and if you disagree, you’re a terrori….no wait

I didn’t say that, you misunderstood; I chose to use the wrong words

But then again, if you took the time to thoroughly read the bill

You’d know that we didn’t state we can arrest and kill Americans

We can only do that to terrorists who aren’t citizens of the greatest country ever

What do you mean when you say it’s a trap?

Okay, so technically, if we suspect you of terrorism, you’re no longer a citizen

But hey, it’s not like an everyday thing like daring to disagree

With your god given and always correct government can be called terrorism

We have to have legitimate reasons to consider you one

STOP IT! You’re becoming too knowledgeable about the situation

Fine, if you have more fingers than normal, or have seven days of food

Stocked up in your house, we can claim you’re involved in terrorism

But, be real. In the economy you now have, how could you afford a week’s worth of food?

And stop complaining about equality. Equality is definitely here.

Rich people are on the same footing as rich people

Poor people are just as screwed as other poor people

Do you see now how equality works?

The middle class, really? Screw the middle class

I mean, wait, I mean I’d love to screw the middle class

Because I love them so much, you know, right, eh?

Oh well, you get the point, stop asking me questions

You’re supposed to just agree with me, and be happy you have a job

Stop whining about low wages, everyone else’s job sucks too

Why do you think you’re entitled to a good, well paying job?

Don’t you see all the others out there have accepted us raping them?

What makes you special? You don’t have lots of money

You don’t feed my back pockets and whisper sweet nothings in my ear

I don’t believe you paid for my most recent land plot in the Cayman Islands

So, why don’t you just shut up and pay your taxes like a good bitch should?

How dare you demonstrate your annoyance with me

Occupy this, occupy that? Media, demean them NOW

The tea party was a fun thing to praise, but this group just knows too much

Thank god they don’t have a solution yet, or else I might be in some serious shit

Police, here, you need the extra cash, we need more ground forces serving our needs

Arrest everyone and beat anyone you don’t find mindlessly cooperative

I give you full reins, do what you must to promote my beliefs

Shut down all who oppose me

Ahhh, look at all my zombies. The apocalypse has occurred.

So many people now resigned to just living with the meager stuff I give them

They can’t whine too much because I’ll just raise their taxes, inflate their money

Send their children off to needless and undeclared wars

I’ll sit back while my Super Pac feeds me more and more cash

Heck, the day I step into congress or the senate, I’ve got a 176k salary

For the rest of my life, even if I only work for two years….or less

Man, isn’t democracy great??