When Rumors Turn Ugly

Finding One's True Self: Part 3

By Xan Steel

Over the course of three months, Daniel had managed to find everything he needed. A decommissioned ship that would support a crew of four, tools he required to make the repairs, hydroponics that could produce enough food, and an oxygen system as a backup. Some newer suits should he need to go on a spacewalk. Four working stasis chambers, complete with regenerative power cells should the power of the ship fail at all. An older model communications array that he could convert to a light-speed communications array. Computers to run the ship and labs he had planned out, as well as enough storage space with several of the newly designed quantum storage cubes. He also managed to get his hands on a working EM Drive. It would do the job needed, even though it was a revision 2 Drive. Plus, some solar panels should they need a jump start. Now all he had to do was put it all together.

While repairing the ship, his boss, a long-time friend, stopped by one day. His name was Mathew, and he was also a fur, but he was a more common type, a panther.

"Hey, Rubicant! What are you up to there?" He asked.

"Oh! Hey, Hunter didn't hear you come up. Me? Oh, just building a starship. What about you?" Daniel asked in return.

"A starship? What, are you planning on leaving this beautiful mess we have here on Earth?" He asked jokingly.

Daniel replied "Yes" without any hesitation which surprised Mathew.

"What about Maria? You know she'd worry herself to death over you," Mathew added.

"Which is why I planned on persuading her to join me." Daniel finished.

Mathew was at a loss as to why he would do this. He waited for Daniel to finish and come down for a bit and talked with him more. "Listen, Dan, I know from what you've told me that you both have had it hard, but do you think leaving is the best answer?" he asked.

Daniel paused in his work and leaned his back on the hull and breathed deeply before sighing. "Understand Mat. Rough doesn't cover it. At the very core of my being, I no longer feel home here, and it's tough to describe this feeling." He said looking up at the clear blue sky. "Ever since our parents disowned us, it's felt like Earth no longer wants me here either. So, I attempted to remove myself. While I'm grateful that Maria saved me, deep down I wish she hadn't." Daniel finished.

"Hey, I'm sure at some point you'll find home here. It just takes time." Mathew said as he put his hand on Daniels' shoulder to comfort him.

"No, it's not here. I know, I feel that much. I need to start looking elsewhere." He said as he moved off to continue working.

"Where do you plan on going?" Mathew asked.

"Alpha Centauri it's a mission that was considered lost, and I want to see what's there since we know there are habitable planets there," Daniel added.

"Isn't there a black hole near there?" Mathew's voice showed his interest.

"According to NASA's observers, sounds exciting doesn't it?" Daniel said in a manner that might peak Mathews interest.

"Well, I have to admit, I've always wanted to see and study a Black Hole, but not quite sure if I'm ready to leave my home to explore though." He said still showing his interest.

"Well, give it some thought as I still have a lot of work before she's complete," Daniel added.

"What about Maria?" Mathew asked.

Daniel turned to look at him, "I have enough room for four comfortably." He replied, thinking that if he knew, Mathew would likely to want to come along.

They chatted throughout the day, as Mathew helped out for a while before calling it a day and parting ways for the night, as Daniel got home just before Maria arrived. He got cleaned up and began making dinner for them. He heard her pull up and get out of their car. He could hear the car door slam shut, which didn't sound like a good thing. He went to greet her at the door just as it flung open as she barged in. "Welcome home." He said cautiously.

She walked up to him and slapped him hard across his face. "When were you planning to tell me!" She yelled at him.

He rubbed his face. "Tell you what?" Daniel had never seen her look so red, or her breathing so heavily.

Maria replied to him, and while she wasn't yelling this time, one could still hear her anger, "That you are planning to go into space and kill yourself!"

The thought of killing himself had never even entered his mind, and it made him wonder where she got that idea. "I never planned to go up there just to die. I just don't feel home here anymore." He said with a tremble in his voice.

She went to the kitchen and came back with a knife and handed it to him. "You're so hell-bent on it, then just get it over with!" she angrily said as she stormed off to the bedroom.

He put the knife down gently and went to the kitchen to finish making dinner as his body shook. He wept the whole time but managed to complete it. He didn't feel like eating it though, so he wrapped it up and put it in the fridge for the time being and went to sit out on the back-porch area where he had his stuff for viewing the night sky. He couldn't bring himself to do anything but cry at the table. He didn't want it turning out like this. He wanted it to be a happy surprise that might have interested Maria in wanting to come along. But now, he didn't know what to do.

After a while, Maria finally calmed down and began to think more clearly again. Realizing she had overreacted by a lot and needed to apologize to him. Maria went to the living room and saw the knife she had handed him earlier sitting there on the coffee table. Maria gently picked it up and put it away in the kitchen, where she saw a note on the fridge. "I finished making dinner, it's in the fridge, just warm it up in the mic." She looked at the note and could see water spots on the paper. It made her feel worse knowing that she brought him to tears.

She made her way to the back porch and saw him sleeping there with his head in his arms. She moved over to his side and sat next to him and wrapped her arms around him in a gentle hug. He jerked up at suddenly being touched and saw her next to him. "Did, did you see my note on dinner?" he asked quietly.

She nodded as she sniffled. Daniel hugged her tightly in return as she spoke. "I'm so sorry I overreacted. I'm sorry for hitting you. I just don't know what came over me," she said through her tears.

He continued to hug her tightly and kissed her cheek. "It's okay. I'm just not sure where you got the idea from that I was going to kill myself up there," he replied.

"I jumped to conclusions when Sandra said she had talked with Mathew about it, and that you were planning to go into space. I didn't even hear the rest of what she said before my mind took it the wrong way," she finished.

"I had planned to surprise you with the news, in hopes that you might come with me, as I want you too." He told her. She cried harder now knowing it was the truth with him wanting to leave Earth, but more so because he wanted her to join him. That was a lot to ask.

 "I don't know," she said.

"Take your time to think about it. The ships, not 100% complete, and will take about another two or so months to finish," Daniel finished. She nodded and leaned into him more as he held her there softly under the light of a full moon.