Losses

Finding
One’s True Self: Part 51

By
Xan Steel

Cartina
woke up one morning in the flat she was renting while she worked away from home,
which was on the other side of Valdoro. She hated having to work so far from
home, but ever since she had been called in to work on the Council, she never
realized just how serious the Derlenian situation was. What she hated more
though, was having to work against her mate, and not tell him.

Her
stress level was beyond anything she had ever experienced before after hearing
back from a local doctor about her current health during a routine checkup. He
had called her in about a week after he ran several tests on her. He told her
after he retested everything, he could only come to one conclusion. She was
dying, as her DNA was slowly falling apart and gave her only four cycles to
live.

At
the end of every day she would cry herself to sleep. Wishing she could get help
in this, but there was no help. Except, The Progenitor. Only the protein he
produced could hold her DNA together. The only issue was, would she be able to
receive it in time.

Cartina
knew the answer lay with her mate. However, getting it from him without him
raising any suspicion with her involvement in the Council, well she was unsure how
to do just that. Though she suspected that at some point she would need to come
clean with him. Her only worry there was, would he get an annulment from her.

***

She
sighed at her desk in her office, while looking over reports that were coming
in. Another ten thousand Derlenians dead in the colonies along the outer rim of
the galaxy. Which would put the death toll near a hundred thousand.

No
one knew why or how this had started, especially when it started happening
thirty cycles ago. This was around the time they gotten a small positive hit from
the computer that The Progenitor had been found on Julyna’s ship. Both Captain
Julyna, and Doctor Mortora claimed it was just a piece of debris that they had
encountered after discovering a Quantum Vortex not far from their ship. E’Lum,
had never discovered anything in their ship’s computers, other than the fact they
had one not connected to the main computer.

She
regretted not letting him finish his work, but she was being pressured by the
other three to get things moving. However, none of them realized that Captain
Darrean was already on a mission for the Midnight Order, and instead of
following the orders they gave her, continued the mission she was already on.
Spying on the Kres Government as a potential threat.

There
had been to many mistakes on their part to get this taken care of quickly, but they
were running out of time, and now it would seem that she was as well.

She
put away the paperwork she had been working on just as Fariden contacted her.
She sighed softly, not really wanting to talk with him, but answered it anyway.

Cartina
spoke in a tired tone, “Yes Fariden?” she answered.

He
looked at her for a moment before speaking in a concerned tone, “Are you all
right Cartina?” he asked.

She
looked at him for the first time and felt him caring for her well-being. She
spoke softly, “No, I’m not, as I just found out from the doctor that I’m
dying.”

His
eyes went wide in shock, “What, how?” he asked in a surprised tone.

“DNA
degradation,” Cartina replied quietly.

“How
long?” he asked.

“Four
cycles,” she replied.

He
hung his head, “I’m so sorry that we failed you and many others,” he said
quietly.

Cartina
sighed openly, “No, it’s no one’s fault, we did our best to get this going
sooner, but apparently it wasn’t meant to be.”

Fariden
gave her an angry look with a tone to match, “No it’s not our fault, but it is
the GrandMaster’s fault for blocking us at every turn. If he hadn’t interfered,
we could have saved you and many others.”

She
looked at him with her head at a slight tilt. She understood his anger. She
spoke in an understanding tone, “I understand your thoughts on this, but he has
full and final authority in all matters on a galactic scale. This is something
we could never override him on. For whatever reason this being is very
important to him, that he is willing to sacrifice others to get to him.”

Fariden
nearly yelled, “That doesn’t make it.”

She
interrupted him by holding up her handpaw. “I know, but arguing it hear isn’t
going to change things.”

He
calmed down after a moment and spoke in a more relaxed tone, “You are right of
course.” He paused briefly. “In other news, I did manage to get an update.”
Cartina looked at him more intently. “Even though the Kestrel was destroyed,
Julyna and two of her mates did survive. They are currently enroute to Dr.
Maynar Graphra’s Station.”

Cartina
sat there thinking for a moment before speaking. “I’m thinking then that the
Progenitor has survived. Elsewise, why would she continue going there.”

Fariden
spoke in a quizzitive tone, “I do have contacts in the Sartorgan Government. I,
could have a blockade setup before they reach the station.”

Cartina
was deep in thought before she answered, “No, let them be. We’ve had our
chance, now let’s see if Dr. Graphra can do better.” As Fariden agreed with
her. It was at this point they both received a call on their Council channel.
Torid was contacting them.

***

Torid
waited for a good five minutes before they finally answered and appeared on
screen before him. He really didn’t like dealing with these four silhouettes and
taking their orders, but until he could discover who they were, it was all he
could do.

He
spoke, “I’m not sure if you have received this news or not, but I wanted to let
you know that the Kestrel was destroyed a little while ago. Some reports are
claiming that all hands were lost. Though I’m having a hard time believing it.”

The
Phalynian spoke, “It’s good that you question it, because there were forty
survivors that were picked up by the Sartorgan government. The ship that picked
them up is headed to Dr. Graphra’s station. We believe The Progenitor survived
and will be arriving in a few days-time.”

Torid
didn’t question them on how they knew the Progenitor was on that ship, and spoke
up, “If you are wanting me to send someone there to collect him, I’m afraid
that’s not possible. Not without asking for permission to cross the borders,
and that takes weeks to get.”

The
female Derlenian on the far right spoke, however her tone of voice caught Torid’s
attention quickly. “No, instead we will have to wait and see what happens
before we make a move.”

Torid
was a bit shocked, but a single word escaped his lips quietly, “Cartina?”

It
was at this point everything came to a standstill. The tension in the room
became heavy to the point of suffocating. The image began to reveal itself to
him as he saw Cartina staring at him. She spoke softly. “Yes.”

Torid
stepped back against the railing of the console. He couldn’t believe it. His
own mate was apart of this Council. So many questions ran through his head, but
before he could begin asking, she appeared before him. As he heard the Sylurian
mention something about a planetary transporter system.

Torid
was in such a state of shock, that without realizing it, he had turned from her
and started to walk away. Only to hear her voice again.

“Torid,
please wait.” She begged him.

He
stopped but didn’t turn to look at her and spoke in a soft yet upset tone,
“Why, why should I?”

Cartina
heard his tone but continued. “Because I need to explain things to you.”

He
turned to look at her and saw that she was on her knees with her handpaws out
in a cupped expression. He knew what she was doing but stayed where he was.
“Fine, explain.”

Hearing
his short-tempered response hurt her deeply, but she began to explain things.
“Do you remember twenty cycles ago when I got that promotion?” She asked as she
watched him nod. “I thought that was going to change everything for us. More
home time, which would lead us to having that family we talked about.” She
watched him nod again. “However, as it turned out, this is what that promotion
turned into. I’ve never been happy here, but the roll I’ve been apart of has
been of the utmost importance.” She watched him cross his arms before
continuing, “The Progenitor. We need him now more than ever.”

Torid
spoke, “Why do you need him so badly, that you can’t wait to see what Dr.
Graphra can do?”

A
tear rolled down Cartina’s right cheek and Torid caught this, “Because for the
last thirty cycles, Derlenians have been dying in the colonies on the outer rim
of the galaxy, and I’m a youngling of one of those colonies.”

Torid
looked at her before it hit him, when he spoke his tone was both soft and
confused, “Wait, does this mean you are dying as well?” he asked as Cartina
nodded. “How long?” he asked. She just lowered her head into her arms while
still holding that expression with her handpaws. Torid moved to her and pulled
her handpaws apart and gently grabbed her head and pulled it up to look at him.
“How long?” he asked again.

Cartina
spoke in a meek tone, “Four cycles”

Torid’s
mind began to work on a solution, as he pulled her into his arms and held her
there as she wept. From the link she had with him, he could feel her regret,
anger, sadness, and possible loss of him.

Torid
turned to the rest of the Council and spoke, “Reveal who you are to me now, if
you what to get things done quickly.

The
Phalynian was first, as Torid soon discovered he was a retired Fleet Admiral,
named Jartan. The Sylurian female turned out to be Hueni, The head of the
S.H.O. The last Derlenian female was the previous head of the Midnight Order, Deraycor.

Jartan
spoke, “Now that you know who we are, we need to know how you plan to get this
taken care of.”

Torid
spoke again with a matter of fact tone. “First things first, I’m taking care of
Cartina, then I’ll be getting in contact with the GrandMaster and talking to
him about what he plans to do. From there I’ll formulate another plan to get
things moving forward. Deal?”

The
other three Council members nodded to him after a moment of speaking privately
with each other.

***

Torid
took Cartina with him, as they both headed to his transport. Along the way he
used his communication device and contacted GrandMaster Kai. Explained what he
found out from Cartina, and her current condition. Kai told him to head to the
Central Medical Center as she would meet them there.

Upon
Arriving Torid rushed Cartina into the Emergency center and told them what was
going on. This is when GrandMaster Kai appeared and took them both back to a
private room and closed the door.

 Kai looked Cartina over, as Torid sensed she
was doing something but didn’t know exactly what. After a moment of silence Kai
spoke, “I’m sorry Torid, I won’t be able to repair the damage already done, but
I can temporarily halt the degradation.”

Torid
asked, “Would that buy me sometime to get her to Dr. Graphra and the
GrandMaster?”

Kai
looked at him and knew what he was asking. “Yes, but I don’t know if they are
going to be able to help you anymore.”

Torid
looked at her for a moment before speaking, “I believe the Progenitor is either
there, or on their way there. Therefore, I need to get this stopped as soon as possible.”

Cartina
spoke up, “There have been to many lives already lost to this in the last
thirty cycles.”

Kai
looked at them both, as much as she wanted to help. Doing this would have dire
consequences, as she explained. “One last thing, if I do this, it will shorten
the last of her life. The degradation once this ability wears off will speed
up. I can only hold it back for about two months. If what you explained is true
according to your doctor, it would be wiser to let this naturally progress. I
know that may sound heartless, but you would have a much longer time frame.
Plus, if it is true and the Progenitor is on their way there, I’m not sure what
the GrandMaster, and Dr. Graphra will have to do at the start, and it could go
beyond the two months timeframe I would be giving you.”

Torid
and Cartina looked at each other before Torid sighed openly, as Cartina spoke, “Then
it is decided that we let it progress naturally.”

Kai
breathed a little easier and spoke, “I’ll inform the GrandMaster to expect you
both at Dr. Graphra’s station, and what your situation is, hopefully they’ll be
able to help you out,” she finished.

***

Once
both Torid and Cartina got to the transport, Cartina blocked Torid from
entering, and got back on her knees in front of him and held out her handpaws
in that upward cupped expression. Torid spoke softly, “Cartina, you don’t have
to do this.”

She
spoke, “Yes I do. I’m sorry for any pain I have caused you with how things have
turned out. I never wanted any of this to happen.”

Torid
walked up to her until her handpaws were touching his chest and took both her
handpaws and separated them. He then moved closer to her and used both his
handpaws to hold her head softly, and then leaned in to kiss her deeply before
speaking softly. “Cartina, I love you very much, and I want you to live a long life
with me. Yes, at first I was in shock but now I’m past that and my only concern
is your wellbeing.”

She
looked at him as tears gently flowed down her cheeks as she softly leaned in and
nuzzled under his chin in submission. After her mind had finally calmed down,
she could sense that he wasn’t in pain like she thought. The thought of losing
him after all these cycles terrified her beyond words.

Torid
spoke softly again while holding her close, “Cartina, I’m sure you’re worried
that I’m going to leave you.” He gently guided her head to have her look at him
directly. “It’s going to take a lot more than working against each other to
cause me to leave you.”

She
smiled gently at his words and spoke softly, “Then you’ll still let me bare
your young?” she asked.

“I
would have no other female bare my young but you Cartina” he replied.

***

After
a couple of hours, both Torid and Cartina were on their way to Dr. Graphra’s
station. During this time Torid contacted a friend he had in the Sartorgan immigration
system and asked if he could set them up with permission to travel to the
station. He said that wouldn’t be an issue and that he would have it taken care
of before they reached the station. This was a good thing, as the ship Torid
was using didn’t have a Jump Drive, and it would take three weeks at high warp to
reach the station.

During
this time Fariden contacted Cartina and updated her and Torid with information
about a colony world. He spoke, “Our intel just reported a ghastly discovery.”

“What
is it?” Cartina asked.

“The
dual colony on Zarkor, which sits just inside the border to the outer rim. All
inhabitants were found dead.” Fariden replied.

Cartina
sat there stunned before speaking in a stunned tone, “That was a large
Derlenian, and Sylurian colony.”

Fariden
replied, “Just a little over three hundred thousand inhabitants.”

Torid
spoke, “Did they discover why they had all died?”

“DNA
degradation.” Fariden responded.

Cartina
spoke up, “Wait that doesn’t make sense with the Sylurians. Why would their DNA
degrade?”

“I’m
not entirely sure why.” Fariden said.

Torid
spoke again, “Is Hueni there?”

This
is when the view screen split and showed her, “Yes admiral I’m here.”

Torid
spoke in a matter of fact tone with her, “Are you finally ready to admit to
your government that your species is not from our galaxy, but instead the
Fayriden Galaxy?”

Hueni
just looked at him for a moment before she received a file from him. She scanned
over the file quickly, and discovered it was the last thing Mortora had written
before her death. In it she states that The Progenitor’s DNA is a complete match,
and that in order to test just how complete, she impregnated herself with his
seed. Even though it was a complete success it nearly killed her. After
continued testing she could only come to one conclusion. The Sylurian species
was his genetic ancestors.

Hueni
spoke again after reading the file and applying it to what was discovered at
the colony. “This is going to be difficult to explain, much less accept. There
are many in the government that do not want this information to surface. Only
because they fear many of us leaving and going back to the Fayriden Galaxy.”

“Why
should they fear that?” Cartina asked.

Torid
knew why, but Hueni replied, “Splitting a species up between two galaxies and
excepting them both to survive with smaller numbers and no help from the other,
due to distance. It’s almost an impossibility.” Hueni sighed openly and
continued, “I’ll be honest, as it stands this information is likely to never
see the light of day, especially after nearly losing the species as a whole due
to a virus we didn’t even know we had.”

Torid
spoke again, “What do you plan to do with this information then?”

Hueni
looked at him for a moment before answering him, “I’m going to keep it and
share it with those that I can trust.” She paused briefly before continuing. “It’ll
take time, but I believe I can slowly spread this information. Since it is
coming from the one that did in fact save us, it’s likely to be more believed.
I just wish I knew where Doctor Kimen was, as he’s likely to have more of
Mortora’s information with him.”

“I’ll
see what I can uncover for you in his location. I’ll just need some time.”
Torid replied as Hueni thanked him.

***

Over
the course of the three weeks it took to get to Dr. Graphra’s station. Torid
took care of Cartina in the small sleeping quarters they had on his little ship.
Every few days she would feel ill, and tried to rest as best as she could. She
had told Torid that this was one of the reasons she had gone to see the Doctor back
on Valdoro.

Over
the time they traveled, Cartina could feel Torid’s worry for her. It gave her a
level of comfort, only because it reinforced his words that he wouldn’t leave
her.

Torid
contacted Kimen during the times Cartina slept. It’s not that he didn’t trust
her with Kimen’s location. Kimen only would talk with him when he was alone. During
these times, Torid filled him in on what was happening and what Hueni needed.

“Thank
you for informing me Torid.” Kimen began, “I’ll send you copies of all of her
work to you so that you can pass them on to Hueni.”

“I
take it you still wish to remain in hiding then?” Torid asked.

“Yes,
as I have managed to move a few hundred of us to this new world that, quite literally
is in the middle of nowhere. Which is a rare thing to find in such a small
galaxy.”

Torid
lightly laughed, “Starting your own government I see.”

Kimen
smiled broadly, “Yes, though I’ll be working behind the scenes here.”

Kimen
to continued to share the small colonies achievements with him, with farming
for their first harvest, their excavation team finding rare metals that they
could use in trading, to him setting up their first school for the influx of
younglings.

Torid
spoke, “Sounds like you’ve managed to get a good and simple life going there, which,
if I’m honest, sounds like paradise.”

“You
are more than welcome to retire here, as everyone here knows what you’ve done
for us in keeping our location a secret.” Kimen replied.

“One
day perhaps. Right now, my first concern is my mate Cartina. I need to ensure
that she can be saved.” Torid answered back.

“If
anyone can, then Dr. Graphra is the only one. Wish I had access to his work
though, would be great for our school.” Kimen said.

Torid
smiled at him, “Once the dust settles with everything, I’ll see if I can
convince the good Doctor to send you all the information you want, as I don’t
see it being an issue.”

Kimen
thanked him again and closed out the channel as Torid sat there reading the information
that Kimen had sent him to give to Hueni. There was even a small energy package
that he had sent along, that contained a small portion of Mortora’s egg. This
alone would explain everything in the greatest of detail to the Sylurian
government. For now though, he put this information in transit to Hueni, and
went to check on Cartina before they arrived at Dr. Graphra’s Station.