Max wasn't one
to question his existence, but oftentimes, he felt insignificant. Compared to
the rest of the universe, he was just a tiny, teeny lump of atoms who happened
to be aware of himself and the small world around him. The thirst for knowledge
was boundless, and even the tallest of the tallest was still unable to touch
the heavenly dots on the night sky.

Do you remember that night
Upon the land of eternal snow?
It was a beautiful sight
Of people dancing in mellow
May we touch the sky
Lest we from heavens leave
Watching the burrows lie
On the land of fiery sheen

The dog closed
the book he was reading. That was… interesting, sure, but that wouldn't help
him finish his homework. The book wasn't about German grammar, heck, it even
had English translation of the rhymes.

Okay, so…

He pushed the
book aside and stared at his German textbook. The questions looked simple,
easy.

Easy, his arse.

What was this
contijuguation… congugation… thing? Why did they have so many words for 'the'?
What was even the difference between 'zu' and 'nach' anyway?!

He heard some
noises and he glanced up. There were some girls looking at him while shyly giggling
to themselves. One of them waved at him, but he just smiled back.

The girls
giggled and went away.

He then saw Tom
with a tray of books, putting them on the shelves with his tail lazily swaying as
he did so. Well, they were in a corner of the library, anyway.

Sometimes, he thought he was cute. The wolf was… unique. There was a small cut on the lower part of his left ear. That was interesting, but nothing overly surprising. Although his fur colouration wasn't that special at all—grey with a lighter grey on his face and inner arms, hand, and maybe chest, stomach, and legs—his eyes were.

They were very
light brown, almost red, and he'd be lying if he ever saw someone with that eye
colour.

The wolf also
fascinated him. Sure, Max had people gawking at him before, even those who
outright flirted with him in broad daylight, men or women, but the wolf didn't.
He seemed to have taken a liking to him, but he kept that to himself.

He wasn't
against gays, but when they flirted with him as if he were a prey to be eaten, that
bound to include some retorts or even punches. He also didn't want the details
of what they said they wanted to do with him. But fuck it, the wolf looked cute
when he was flustered. His tail was longer than other wolves he knew, too, and
it looked downright fluffy.

Somehow, he felt like he had seen Tom before. But when? Maybe just
another grey wolf since there were lots of them. Yet, he felt like he had met
him before somewhere.

He leant back
on the chair and took a deep breath. How long was it? When would the wolf's
shift end?

Okay, back to
his daydre—er, afternoon-dreaming. He glanced at the clock just above the wall of
the entrance to the computer area, it was close to 17.20.

His gaze went
back to Tom. The wolf didn't seem to know that he was sitting not that far from
him, which allowed the dog to observe him more.

Tom was one of
the guys he appreciated for not glorifying him as 'the football star'. It had been almost two months, and the wolf looked
at him as if he was just any other student. Well, he did catch him stealing a
few glances here and there in the classes, but at least he didn't make any move
to get 'closer'—as in 'get closer to the football captain so I can get more
attention'-closer—to him.

They chatted, sure, but mostly it was due to Max bumping into him in the hallways, canteens, even in other areas of the campus. Tom started some but he wasn't being overly clingy.

“Max?"

He looked up to
find the wolf looking at him. “Yep?"

“You did your
homework?"

“Dude, I got no
idea about this." He pointed at his textbook.

Tom chuckled
and glanced at the tray he was holding. “Just a few more books left." Then he
went to another shelf.

Max smiled. The
wolf didn't judge. That was something he really appreciated. So what if he was
a jock and cared about his grades? Was it so downright bizarre if a football
team member went to the library? The wolf just looked at him and shrugged as if
it was not a big deal. Besides, if anyone wanted to wonder, they'd better
wonder how Octo could be both a nerd and a jock at once.

He liked to get
his mind as sharp as his muscles, thank you. Well, as sharp as he could,
anyway. He was no way a nerd who aced all the classes he attended, but he had
respectable grades, more than enough to keep his place on a football
scholarship until graduation.

He glanced at
his textbook again. Now that he thought about it, he should've lingered around
after classes. But he couldn't do anything if people just swarmed him like
nobody's business.

There was
nothing wrong with asking his junior to help him with his homework, right? Tom
didn't seem to mind him asking. True, he was the older one who was supposed to
teach the wolf instead, but knowledge could come from anywhere, right?

His phone buzzed with a message. He picked it up. Andy Horny Kitty: “m8, u alive?"

He typed his response. “Unfortunately yes, thank you. U guys having a good time?:"

The reply was almost instantaneous. “Andy Horny Kitty: the sun's not even down
yet u fool"

He chuckled and typed, “Too bad I'm not a weather machine." Then he put his phone away.

Huft. He
reached for his textbook and read the first question. At least he shouldn't
have zero knowledge on his homework.

Nope nope nope.
He pushed the book away and slumped on the table, waiting for salvation to come
from the skies. First, chemistry and biology, and now this? He really sucked at
them.

He took a
glance back at the book. The book just stared innocently at him.

He sighed in
defeat.

Just when he
was about to stand up, Tom came to his table, carrying his own German textbook
and a laptop bag. His shirt was gone, replaced by a casual-looking striped
t-shirt. There was a slight spring in his steps. Max chuckled, he surely was happy
to work here.

The wolf smiled
at him and put his book on the table in front of him. “Sorry. I wasn't long, was
I?"

“Too long." Max
didn't lift his head from the table. “I have just lost my will to go to the
German class next Tuesday."

Tom laughed a
little and sat down across him. “Mate, aren't you German? You know, from your
last name."

“Don't remind
me." Max covered his muzzle with his hand and closed his eyes. “I don't speak
German."

“Oh, sorry."

The dog opened
his eyes and looked at Tom. Damn, his eyes were really mesmerising. They were
bright but dim. Brilliant, but pale. Brown, but red. No one had the right to possess
eyes of such contrasting sheen.

And now they
were looking at him in sympathy. Pity, maybe.

Max covered his
eyes with his paws. “Please don't look at me like that." He then straightened
up; just when he thought that the wolf didn't judge. His ears flattened in
subdued annoyance.

“Oh, sorry."
Tom looked away. He opened his book. “It's just…" he flipped the pages. “you
remind me of my old self. Sorry, I didn't mean to think bad of you."

His old self?
Now he stared at him in curiosity. Tom did look apologetic, he flipped the
pages to look for their homework, almost absent-mindedly. Max could tell that
his mind wasn't really here right now.

The library was
a quiet place, and it turned even quieter when Tom stopped talking. He didn't
look up from his book, as if scrutinising the text. Max was starting to
feel bad, but there was something from the wolf that piqued his curiosity.

Tom sighed, and
it seemed quite forced. “Really, sorry." He then looked up to look at his eyes
with his ears nearly flat.

Max stared into
the wolf's eyes, they were deeply apologetic. Tom didn't judge, but he could
tell that he felt pity and sympathy towards someone. But that someone wasn't
Max.

“Max, I…"

“It's okay,
Tom." Max smiled, this time genuine, not teasing or grinning one. “We're both
guilty."

“I…" The wolf
looked away, deflated. “I guess you're right."

Max ruffled his
head fur, this time smiling in delight, but he pulled his hand back when he
noticed Tom wasn't moving.

In fact, Tom's
eyes were wide. They were staring at the book, but they looked… hollow.

Max looked at
his eyes, “Tom?" but regretted doing so.

Tom looked at
him, no longer with wide eyes, but those eyes still looked drained of colours.

Just as quickly
as it began, it stopped. The colours seeped in again, filling them with vibrancy.
Those eyes shone again. The wolf's ears pointed back upwards as if nothing
happened.

Max couldn't
tear his gaze from him.

“Sorry about
that," Tom said, but this time, his voice sounded different. He turned away,
but looked at the dog again, smiling. “Where were we? Right, the homework."

Wait, the voice
was wrong. It was too flat, too shallow. Even his accent changed.

“Tom?"

Tom looked at
him. “Yes?"

Slowly, Max
took his hand. “Thomas?"

“Yes—"

And it happened
again. That smile faded, those eyes disappearing again. But this time, they
didn't immediately come back. Max's worry was too great. “Tom, what's gotten
into you?!"

No answer.

This time, Max
dared look at him again. He almost shouted, “Tom?"

Several hushes were
directed at them, he even saw someone walking towards him, but stopped and
turned back.

Then the
colours went back into his eyes. Tom blinked a few times, then looked at Max.
“Max?"

“Tom, what
happened?!" he shook his hand.

“I…" he looked
at his hand, then he pulled it back from the other's hold and wiped his face. “I
scared you, didn't I?" He said, “Sorry."

“Tom, what the
fuck!"

“Mr
Kleinschmidt, Mr Purnama! Please don't shout! This is a librar—."

Max and Tom
turned their head to the direction of the sound. There was a bear staring at
them, with many more looking at them, some whispering amongst themselves. Max
then stood up and apologised, “I'm very sorry. It won't happen again."

The bear looked
concerned. “Are you okay, kid? You weren't having a fight, did you?" he asked,
looking at Max and Tom who was wiping his face.

“We di—"

“No, Mr
Paddington." Max turned his head; the wolf was looking at the bear, but it was
clear from his expression that he was troubled. “We didn't have a fight, I was
just having a very bad day, that's all. And he was helping me to calm down."

“Are you sure, Tom?"

Tom took a deep
breath. “Yeah. It's just… really a bad day, that's all. Sorry if I made a
noise."

“If you say so,
then." The bear didn't appear convinced, but he stepped away. “You know where I
am if you need me." Then he walked away.

The dog sat
back down. He noticed people were whispering, but he ignored them and looked at
Tom. The wolf was holding his face in his hands, then he looked at the ground,
then at the ceiling, then back at the book. Tom sighed and kept staring at the
book until he took something from his laptop bag.

He took a water
bottle and took a gulp. He then poured some into his hand and washed his face,
using his hands to wipe it away.

“Tom," Max
started, feeling unsure. What just happened? What was with Tom? “Are you okay?"

The wolf took
another deep breath, then put the water bottle back into his laptop bag and
looked at the book. “Yeah, I'm okay."

Max took his
hand and said, “Thomas?"

Tom looked at
him. There were some traces of the previous hollowness, but at least this time
those eyes were back to that vibrant reddish brown. That voice was back,
accompanied by his characteristically warm accent. His face looked flustered,
but this time unlike the usual.

“What just
happened?"

They stared at
each other for a few moments until Tom looked away. “I'm sorry. I'm very sorry.
That's not supposed to happen." His hand curled on the corner of the book, then
relaxed again. “I'm sorry. That was…" his hand curled again, then relaxed. “let's
just say there's a glitch in my brain."

“Tom…"

The wolf
chuckled, but that chuckle was laced with bitterness. “I'm very sorry that you
have to see that, of all people. Let's…" he pulled his hand. “let's just get on
with the homework."

Tom was back on
the book. Max looked at him and understood that he didn't want to talk about
that. He let out a sigh and looked at his book again, his mind now at relative
ease, seeing the wolf back being himself. “That happens often?"

The wolf took
another deep breath. “Somewhat." he flipped a few pages. “It doesn't happen
very often." He kept flipping the pages.

“You want to
talk about it?" he asked genuinely.

In the short
amount of time that they knew each other, Max already felt somewhat close to Tom.
They weren't just contacts or acquaintances, but Max truly felt that the wolf
was his friend. It was what, three months?

And that meant
something, because while he had a lot of friends, there was only a small number
that he would actually call real friends; a side-effect of being somewhat
famous. Tom had been taking good care of him; he knew that the wolf was just
doing his duty as the class captain, but no one would reply to his message and send
him their study guide at 4 when they had a class at 8.

Tom did exactly
that, and he was grateful. Because of that study guide, he got a B+ in Intro to
Organisational Communication quiz last week.

“No, I…" Tom ran his fingers through his head fur, his ears never went up. “It's just…" he flipped the page and stared at it, then he looked at Max. “I'll… I'll tell you when I'm ready."

The dog nodded.

“When we're ready." The wolf corrected.

There was…
something there, some urgency, even fear implied there. As if the thing that
the wolf wanted to tell was something of great terribleness. Max saw something
on the wolf's face, tiredness, defiance. Anger. Helplessness.

Suddenly, Tom's
phone rang. Max almost jumped at it; he realised he'd been staring at the wolf
for too long. He looked at his book and picked his pen up, continuing skimming
the questions.

“What?!"

Max looked up.
Tom was staring at his phone, this time in disbelief. He was about to ask again
when he saw the other's smile slowly grew, this one more honest.

That feeling
was contagious, and Max could hold back a smile. “What is it?"

“Max!" Tom
looked at him, his eyes were sparkling with pure joy. “I made it to the final!"

Max could feel
the happiness radiating from the wolf. “What final?"

“The provincial
conference!" he took his phone and scrolled it. “I beat more than half thousand
accepted submissions and I made it to the final!" he put it back down and
gleamed in delight. The wolf then took a deep breath and rested on the chair,
looking at the ceilings with a soft, relieved smile on his face. “Provincial Conference
on Multiculturalism. I made it." He put his hand on his face. “I bloody made
it. All these nights of clanking away are worth it."

“Congratulations, wolf." Max smiled at him. “You deserve it."

The dog was
grateful for the mood boost. Well, there went the bad mood. The situation
seemed livelier again.

Still, those
eyes fascinated him. Tom was staring at him, a happy smile on his muzzle. His
eyes were twinkling, so full of emotion, a contrast to earlier ones.

Now that he was
back to normal—though the quick emotional turn was definitely not
normal—he dared joke. “Looks like there'll be food to order." He straightened himself
and put his pen aside. “I'm hungry."

“You're
the twat who's supposed to buy me something." Tom kicked him under the table,
making Max laugh. “Piss off."

“Getting creative
at swearing, aren't we?"

“Sorry," Tom
chuckled and glanced around. Max did the same, fortunately their area was
getting deserted. “I couldn't help it."

Max grinned at
him, “The god of swearing has fucking giveth you his power. You may use it."

“Tch." The wolf
snickered. “Stupid wanker."

“Asshole."

“Horseshit."

“Dickhead."

“Bollocks."

“Son of a
bitch."

Tom's snicker
was wide. Max prepared himself, this one might be big.

“Cunt."

“Dude. Rude."

The wolf
chuckled. “Mate, I speak 7 languages and have their swear words fully cocked."

Max faked a
gape. “Oh, my." He bowed slightly at the wolf. “I am nothing, my lord. Please
accept me as your humble apprentice."

“You may rise, for
none shall be my equal."

Max looked at
him. Tom looked at him back.

They laughed
softly.

The library
alarm suddenly went off. Attention, it is
now 21.00. The library will close. Attention à
tous. C'est maintenant 21 heures. La bibl...

Max glanced at
the clock, it was 21.

How long had
they been here again?

“Mate, get your
stuff packed." Tom said with a smile. “They're not joking when they say the
library will close."

Well, at least
the wolf was fine now. There was no trace of his previous… mental breakdown. He
looked happy, and when he stood up, he saw his tail wiggling in content. He
wondered how the wolf could manage to flip his mood so quickly, but if it were
what he needed, then Max wasn't complaining.

That was enough
for him, he thought. While it still made him a bit anxious, the way Tom managed
to calm himself so quickly amazed him. That… thing there was serious, and he
wasn't sure if he wanted to know it yet.

Oh wait, the
homework.

“Dude, we,
like, we didn't do the homework."

“Eh, that." Tom
chuckled and picked up the book. He read it for a few moments, then closed it. “Nah,
easy."

“Seriously?"
Max stood up and pocketed his pen and phone.

“These are
easy. You can just literally find the answers in a dictionary. Look for the
verbs in the brackets, then pick the subject, and you get the conjugated form."

“Really? The
part B?"

“The part B's
only for those who failed the previous exam. We both passed."

Max kicked the
chair back into place and put the rhyme book back into the shelf on his right.
“Oh, great." He grinned as Tom walked next to him. He was about to put his hand
around the other's shoulders, but he held back. What if the previous thing
happened again? Would he be angry?

He contemplated it and decided that it wouldn't be good. Better not touch him for a few
days.

They reached
the lockers and pulled their bags.

“Give me your key
card."

Max looked at
Tom, who wiggled his eyebrows. “What?"

“The queue's
long over there. You want to wait for them?"

He chuckled; he
forgot he got a staff right here. “Hell no. Here."

Tom caught it
with his muzzle, his hands busy with his bag. Max thought it was cute. He then
took it from his muzzle and walked away. “Just wait outside, I'll give you your
card."

Smiling to
himself, he walked away. He noticed people looking at him on the queue and he
glanced at them.

There were the
girls from earlier. He grinned at them a bit. “Hey."

The girls
nearly fainted. He quickly walked outside before any of them could ask for his number.

Not long after
he made it outside, the front lamps were turned off. He took the stairs down
and looked over the small park, down to the bus stop.

He wondered,
which dorm did Tom live in?

“Oi, here."

Turning around,
he saw the wolf and his library card. The wolf was in his jacket, black with
something written on the right chest that he couldn't read.

“Thanks." Max
accepted the card and put it in his wallet.

“Sure." Tom
walked next to him. “In which dorm you live?"

Psh. The dog almost chuckled but held back. It was
interesting how their mind worked in the same way. “In the east dorm."

“Ah, okay. I'm
in the west dorm." Tom's ears went down a bit. “So, see you on Monday? Or you
want to meet again tomorrow for the homework?" he let out a small laugh. “We
didn't get to do it."

“Nah, I got
plans tomorrow. I'll text if I need help." Max smiled and looked at him. “Are you going to be okay, though?"

He saw Tom's
ears go up, then down again. Then the wolf turned to look at him with a small smile.
“Yeah. I'll be okay. Don't worry."

Max didn't
really believe him; while the wolf seemed stable now, who knew he wouldn't
collapse on the way or even worse, in the middle of the road?

Tom's previous
words ringed again in his mind. I'll tell
you when I'm ready. When we're ready.

He nodded. He
respected his secrets. If Tom was still uncomfortable telling it, then he
wouldn't pry. He'd wait until he—they were ready.

“Okay then.
Take care. Call or text me if you need me." He turned left towards his dorm. “You
want me to walk you to your dorm?" He asked the wolf.

“Nah, it's
okay." The wolf said as he smiled, then he turned and walked away. “Monday."

“Monday."

He wished Tom weren't going to
faint on the way.

-

Damn it's only chapter four and I already freaked you out smh